Skylight: The Yarnpire Chronicles II

You remember this post, in which the epic love story of the Misunderstood Loser and her Paranormal Paramour unfolded. Well, as it's Hallowe'en, I thought it was time for the second installment. Be warned, though, it is Hallowe'en, so you might find this post particularly spooky...

Okay, so Nellie our heroine, like, totally hooked up with Viktor, the hunky exchange student from Transylvania. The first few months progressed as one could expect: a lot of teenage angst about piddling trifles, pointless misunderstandings based on their crippling inability to communicate in words, as well as much soul-searching, scenery-chewing and other compound nouns. Because I've now watched True Blood, I'd like you to imagine that there were also a perplexing number of encounters with Faeries, werewolves and a homesick yeti. Anyways, let's skip over all of that and go straight to the obligatory montage of romantic moments. Cue soppy music:

Moonlit walks on deserted beaches.

Joyride on the bow of doomed ocean liner.

Cutesy moment involving spaghetti.

Then, one night, Nellie decides to pay Viktor a spontaneous visit:

No answer. She lets herself in - and finds, to her horror, that Viktor has succumbed to his base yarnpiric instincts. Gasp!

Is there any hope for their relationship???
You'll have to wait on tenterhooks till the next installment, dear readers.

What's mermaid bumfluff? Oh dear. I think you should have a look at this.

The Yarnpire Chronicles

Being a blogger with her finger on the cultural pulse, I thought it time that I jump on the Bandwagon of the Undead. It seems like every other book on Amazon is about vampires and werewolves and all manner of surprisingly salacious entities. Who would have thought that so many female readers would become all a-quiver at the thought of a snog with some sneery-lipped badly-coiffed young fella? There you go. I mean, today's popular culture gets it all wrong - no comfy naps in coffins. No bats. No swishy cloaks. And none of the vampires delight in counting, which - as every child who watched Sesame Street knows - is the first thing you learn in Vampires 101.

Thus I seek to redress the balance with this, my opus:

Skylight: The Yarnpire Chronicles

A story about a clumsy, awkward teenager called Nellie, a student at a typical American highschool, where the Cool Kids wear uniforms of various sporting ranks and the Uncool (as well as the Undead) skulk along the corridors and hide in their lockers. All cheerleaders are wicked, anyone who plays American football is thick and all they ever talk about is the prom.*

* NB: I didn't actually go to an American highschool, so I'm basing this on films like Grease and Mean Girls - so it has to be right. Right?

 

But one day, a new student arrives at the school. Oh, the mystery! 

 

 

to be continued ... 

Phew.

Exciting stuff, eh? 


PART TWO HERE!