Sunday, March 25, 2012

Bun in the Oven

I've not been feeling very creative recently. I can identify the cause of the creative abyss: it's hormonal. For yes, readers, I am ...
(dramatic pause)
With Child.
I have been Blessed by the Murkel of Life.

The Gingerbread Man and I are going to have a gingerbread ... um, cookie. Actually, I'll be doing all the actual having, he's accepting the congratulations and looking pleased with himself (well, he is now. He had a facial expression of frozen shock for about a fortnight.) The, eh, Gingerbread Child is due in September and so far, I've had a very easy time of it - no nausea or other nasty symptoms, I simply have to be fed every four hours or I turn rabid. I storm the kitchen and open cupboards and the fridge, whinging, "I'm staaaaaaaaarving! I'm staaaaaaaarving!"
No, actually, that's not really a pregnancy symptom, because I was like that beforehand, too.

I have been negotiating the maze of information available to pregnant women, though. During the first few weeks of my impending motherhood, I actually made attempts to procure and read books about my Delicate Condition, but then I realised that I wasn't reassured by the blow by blow accounts of foetal development, on the contrary, I found it a bit icky. I feel faint at the sight of blood, so clearly this kind of thing is not for me. I decided to draw a veil over it - ignorance is bliss, after all.

What I have discovered, though, is that pregnancy, childbirth and motherhood are a veritable minefield of judgement and condemnation. Through my perusal of online forums (populated primarily by opinionated pieces of baggage that seem to spend more time online telling other people how to look after their children than offline looking after their own), I have found out that there is a whole checklist of things that you have to do "right" and if you don't do them "right" - well, then, you're Just Plain Evil. Any misstep - any decision to do the wrong thing - is laden with nose-wrinkling censure:
  • homebirth with doula (good) vs hospital birth with doctor (Evil)
  • breastfeeding (good) vs bottle-feeding (Evil)
  • breastfeeding for 24 months (good) vs weaning at 8-12 months (Evil)
  • cloth diapers/nappies (good) vs disposable nappies (Evil) 
  • puréed organic vegetables (good) vs packaged baby food (Evil)
  • stay at home mother (good) vs working mother + daycare (Evil)
  • extra-special madey-uppy name like Tygretta or Säyrit (good) vs boring ol' traditional name like John or Ann (Evil)
Good grief, readers, I don't know about you, but I am ready for the stocks already. That being said, I have decided to take a Frank Sinatra-esque approach to the whole shebang and "do it myyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy way." Yes, I might be sticking Tygrette in Pampers or leaving Säyrit with his/her father when I return to work, but chances are, I won't mess up my little tyke any more than most people do.

Ranting aside.
I'm also trying to make some crochet hats for a local photographer, who wants baby hats in different styles. Alas, my knowledge of babies' heads remains (still) theoretical and I find it hard to judge head-sizes, even with helpful sizing charts. I've modelled the hats on Galia melons, upside-down bowls and big apples, but they are no substitute for a real head:


30 comments:

Liz said...

YAY! How fab for you both. A cookie! Congratulations. Looking forward to hearing about it all along the way. And for what it's worth. 'My way' is the only way...it's yours to grow and care for....

Faith said...

That is just brilliant news! A huge congrats to you both. When I told my husband I was expecting, he too, was silent for a prolonged time (despite knowing that actively 'trying' for a baby may indeed end in...well...a baby!) after a long period of his shock his mother put my mind at rest with the now much quoted words 'I'm sure it will be alright Faith, after all he is good with animals'!

My littlest is a September boy, they are a very lovely age for their first Christmas. As for all that good v evil...sounds like you have it about right, you'll get some things right some things wrong, we all do. My littlest is called Kit, most screwed their noses up until a famous singer called her boy that and then it was acceptable...hhhmmmmm.......

Shirley said...

Congratulations! Pregnancy advice: no matter what you plan to do or not to do, life happens. Parenthood advice: no matter what you plan to do or not to do, life happens (and the baby might not want to fit in with your plans anyway).

Sarah said...

Congratulations :)

Tink Edwards said...

Congratulations!

Marinake said...

Congratulations!
Just do it your way and remember to laugh a lot.
My daughter is 15 months old and it's been a lot easier and funnier than i ever imagined :-)
Just wished i'd discovered crochet before i got pregnant!

Annie said...

Congratulations Gingerbreads, a little Lebkuchen. This is where the fun starts x

Beverooni said...

Congratulations!!!!!! YIPPEE!

barbara l. hale said...

First of all...Congratulations! I have to give my advice from a mother of two kids who have grown up to adulthood healthy and reasonably happy, while you are going through this, take the advice of people you trust and if it doesn't sound right to you, do what you think is right anyhow. Because you will be inundated with "advice." I caught lots of flack when I was going through all this for having to have two C-sections and for not enjoying breast-feeding (WHAT?!) Do what is right for you to have a healthy, happy kid and let the advice go in one ear and out the other unless it rings true to you.

Anny said...

Wow that is great news....I thought it sounded like you were trying to get hubby ready ha ha.

Sweet Seahorse said...

Woo hoo! Congratulations!! I am currently pregnant with number 3 and thankfully I have been able to avoid the advice of do-gooders. I believe that if what you do doesn't harm either you or your baby then you stick with what you are doing. That said I don't smoke, I haven't had a drink of alcohol in nearly 3 years, and apparently I am pretty good at breastfeeding. But I don't take kindly to being told what I must or must not do. Be sure when you see your doctor that you ask what tests they submit you to are necessary and which are optional, because they will book you in for the lot regardless. I also ended up NOT attending childbirth classes and it hasn't made a huge difference to the process of giving birth.
Find your comfort zone and go with it!
xXx Helen
By the way, those hunger pangs are completely normal then they disappear for a few months only to come back with a bang in the third trimester. Unfortunately then the size of your stomach is too small to accommodate the amount of food you want to fit in and you end up with indigestion and reflux :(

Sara said...

Congratulations on your joyous news!

nursenikkiknits said...

Yayyyyyy! Congratulations! Gingerbread cookies are my favourite! Good luck. I can't wait to hear the humour you find in this experience : )

Karen said...

Congratulations!

My stock response became a vacant smile and a thank you; and then I did whatever I wanted!

many blessings to you and Mr. Gingerbread and may you have a very uneventful waiting for the little 'crumb-cruncher' (our fav name for our littles!)

Blessings
Karen

MissMary said...

Congratulations!

Katie K said...

This is very exciting news. Do you have the option (as I did) of using a midwife at a hospital? That way you could have the best of both worlds.

Donna Lee said...

According to your list, I am both Good and Evil. Oh well. I am easily confused in my daily life.

Congratulations! That feeling of shock and awe returns Big Time the first time you hold that lovely little one.

Oh, and babies' heads? Are always bigger than you think.

Erica said...

Congratulations!!! That is so exciting.

If having a baby is anything like getting married, then everyone has an opinion and their opinion is right and everyone else's is wrong. I have found that stopping and taking a deep breath helps, but I have no idea what it's like to be pregnant so this advice could be completely worthless! Lol =). Either way, congrats and I am so, so happy for you guys.

crymson said...

Congratulations! I can't wait to see what crocheted goodies you come up with for your lil bun.

Hookin It With Mr. Lick Lick said...

Simply awesome! And with that being said, there is no 'conventional book on the raising of a child'. You know how you were raised and you'll know how to raise your own. Easy as that. :o) (I can see you shaking your head now...) No, it's not easy per se, but you only have to go with your heart and your head and anything other than that you can contemplate it and go with your gut. How's that for advice? Plus you have loved ones who advice I'm sure you'll take into consideration as well. I bet Mr. Gingerbread is all puffed out huh?

Ati. said...

I come here to wish you a very happy pregnancy the last few months. Enjoy it :) mostly it happens only a few times in your life and it is sóó very special. To feel a new life growing in your belly.
The litle hats are too cute :))

ハンナ Kyoto and Japanese Language Explorer said...

Congratulations. I'm happy for you if you are (although that would be the end of life for me, personally) :)

Paula said...

Congratulations to you both :-)

Jay said...

Congratulations!

Cathy said...

CONGRATULATIONS!! My advice- ignore everyone and go with what works for you. Have some expectation that your growing child will achieve something in life, then hopefully they will get a job and pay for their own therapy to get over your parenting failures! Oh and dress them in their best baby clothes all the time, or they will grow out of them before they are worn!

Debi Y. said...

Congratulations! :)

Anne said...

Congratulations on your Gingerbread 'Cookie' !! I bet you have tons of crochet ideas. Hope to see your new little ones baby blanket. Sure it will be very beautiful! Everyone has great hints on being pregnant but mine is only watch the salts and sugars, which is a norm in ones whole life! I too shall look forward to your humourous blogs on raising a child!! Good Luck!! :)

darsynia said...

Again, congrats! I think you'd appreciate the conversation my husband and I had yesterday about our newest wee one. Her name is Saffron, and we decided that we'd like to figure out how we'd have spelled it if we were going with the super fancy unique spelling...

Xaphryyn, perhaps? or maybe Zaphrynn?

At any rate if you feel like chatting with someone who has recently had a baby, though I'm sure you have friends and acquaintances you know better than me, I'd love to chat! :) Or cheer from the sidelines, if nothing else. Hehe.

Laura said...

Congratulations!!!
I remember the shock me and my hubby had when I got pregnant.
And then all the worries :)) and all the reading and advice that was just bombarding me.
I think you're wise to do it your way. Just take from everyone's advice the pieces that fit into your life or that make sense to you.
My son is now 1 year and 1 month and I've always done what I thought it's best for him (and for me). Including bottle feeding, disposable nappies and so on. Nothing "evil" happened.

I wish you all the best and just enjoy this period!

la_petite_fraise said...

AHH!! Congratulations! I obviously haven't been blogging for a while. What a great surprise to return to! :)